Hoping for a newer better me to emerge in the coming months!?

Not ever wanting to get my pics taken this one is a grandchild's idea of new hairstyle for me with my extra chin, wide middle and flabby arms!

this one is a little less weight but still big and hippo hips cant get into that shirt right now either!

Family reunion pic after the kids took me on a torture walk in the woods, sweat and all!
HENCE THE REASON BEHIND THIS AWFUL PICS IS THIS:

I am venturing back to a doctor supervised diet I had been on once before and lost 110 lbs on.

HarrisFast is a program that many don't know about because it is by word of mouth and two time kick off at the hospital a year drive for members. It is very regimented and precise, If you do not follow all given to you to do then you can be kicked out of it.blood TESTS ARE RUN REGULARLY AND BLOOD PRESSURE AND OF COURSE WEIGHT! UGH HATE THOSE BIG SCALES!

Last time I did so good because most of my eating time was at work and I was in a small room to drown out the outside world! This time I will be amongst scrappy friends who will be eating many other things outside of my box which will give me a challenge. but I know I can do it over bariatric surgery! That is just not in the cards for me!

I will also know I want to feel like I did skinnier now that I am back to where I started several years ago. I cant even walk right now with out pain and to those of you who know I fell the other day , not those pains they are on top of the pains of exercise..."NO PAIN NO GAIN" is what keeps going thru my head. But I do know it can get better than this and I hit it awhile back on Harris Fast, but then Life hit hard with mom and all the things that happen with Alzheimer's and I let lose of the better me and fell back into my avalanche world comforted by food.

NO MORE as This Monday will start me on my road of recovery and HOPE! I pray for God to talk to me and help me each step of the way so that I may live long enough to have other grand kids and hopefully some Daughter in laws along the way! God willing since He is the only one to know my path and where I am headed at this point, Just don't think it is the road I have been taking as of late!

enough Rambling on....

Have Great Day and Week !

Denise

I know I have only a few that watch my blog and I am gonna probably chase some of those away as I use this as one of my confidential parts of the things I have to write down daily...God is gonna be beside me and my husband is the sweet person to help me back into this money , heart and mind.

Tomorrow at 4:30 is my orientation to get into the restart program! Classes probably starting the 6Th of October! Please pray for him HUBBY as for I will try and cook under supervision some batch food for him as I take this year or more journey. Last time that is what it took to get just 110 lb off this large body off mass...We will see this time ..Jami hopefully will keep on me to walk with her more.

What a week! Whew glad it is over....

I feel like we have been under a bad storm cloud following us that is just now lifting and I am tired! here is what has sorta been going on in our lives this week. Moma always said when it rains it pours and that it comes in threes think it feels like mor than three this time!
Thursday.....AM
First part of week Jeff goes majorly high in his blood sugar and can't get it down....Call Doctor on call and with all the insulin already taken he has us do a separate shot other than what we are doing through pump........I am thinking not good at time he takes it......It stars coming down but not fast so he goes on to bed cuz he feels really sickly because of ketosis from sugars above 500.
Around 2:30 AM notice him sitting up several times and ask if he is okay and no response, touch him and he is sweaty and cold and clammy , so jump up turn lights on and see he is going under from sugar dropping too low, run to get peanut butter and crackers and he is too gone to eat them so head back to get juice, get back to bedroom and somehow he has managed to get into our very very small bathroom and just as I ask him how he is doing he crashes into the floor in convulsions, did I say how small our bathroom is, not big enough for him to lay in the floor without his head being against the door jamb...By the way if you have never seen someone in convulsions or seizure than you probably don't know how horrifically they jerk around. Jeff's head was against the door and wood floor pounding his head and not able to get him up as he was slicker than snot from the sweats. 911 time and thank goodness they are only around the corner.
Holding his head to try and keep him from getting concussion too in comes 5 t0 6 EMT's and firemen into our bedroom. they get him on the bed and he is talking to him now that I remembered to suspend the pump and he hates me to call for help in past. His blood sugar is 25.
After an IV, peanut butter sandwich, crackers he now knows who he is and what vital statistics they ask him, and then refuses to go to hospital....needless to say not much sleep for me from 4:30 am till time to go to a class on Thursday morning at TSS for Hot Metal MOMMAS! He still wanted me to go! PRAISE GOD for waking me and for me being there to keep him from leaving me!

Thursday afternoon.......10am to noon class longest class I ever felt like I had been in but glad had friends around me! but when I finish my birdhouse it will be cute! Jeff gets call from his DR. seeing if he is okay and says Doc on call told him tooo big of shot....DUH think we figured that out!

Friday.......Get a call from Terri late they are headed to Cooks Children's with Wesley headaches, pressure and lethargic actions getting worse, Dr. Honeycutt not there till Monday, but they admit him for the week-end. he is sickly and gets sick at stomach .

Saturday ......have class with Tracy and Create Joy team scrapbook in a day! All going good and getting to last part of the day, and get phone call from daughter that it is 89 degrees at the house and they can't get the air to work at my house. Get friend to come see if it is something little or if need to call repair guys. It is bad and Brown's who our warranty is with is gone for the day. GREAT and it is 94 when I get to the house. Toshe does not do good with heat at 16 and heart problems. Jami and Jason and kids are off to go to Florida and don't want Toshe in their house cuz Scrappy their male dog will mark everything when they get back where she has been, So although it cost us when go to a Holiday Inn express that takes small pets. Boys could not take us in either because of their lease agreement. Oh and by the way it is gonna be Fathers Day and Jeff is not happy. Stay-Cation it is not when there is a dog with you in a hotel. house is 99 degrees when we go back to get some things.

Sunday...... By the way Jeff sees his Mom every week-end 1:30 to 3 and she was not responding to anyone this week-end another bummer for Jeff as well as problems at work so phone calls Saturday evening through all day Sunday, less sleep again but we are all cool at hotel!

Monday...Air guy calls me at 9am and says he is headed to my house so grab stuff and head home after checking out. It is still 99 degrees inside....Air is fixed by 11:30 and warranty was still in effect PRAISE GOD! otherwise it would have been 14oo.00 smacker roos...Get a call from Terri they have released Wesley Dr. says not bad enough yet to do anything so they head back to Comanche to wait it out again....poor guy! by the way Terri spent her birthday and Fathers Day away from her family, the 21st is Terri ,Sherri and Jami's birthdays and every couple of years also Father's day! We are all waiting for the fun to stop....LOL....NOT! Last night at 9:30 PM we finally got to 78 degrees after it running constantly to get there and it is great to have slept in my own bed last night. Kids are having great time in Florida and hopefully no more surprises!

Tuesday .......So glad to be home cool and rested again !

I am counting the days till my class with Tim Holtz and Cheryl Darrow this coming Sunday afternoon! the 28th is coming Yipee! WooooHooo! Metal meets grunge or so I hope although anything from these two has gotta be cool.
As I finish some projects will try to post pics especially from my SBIAD and Hot Metal MOMMAS birdhouse!
Keep crafting and take care till next time!
Denise
PS ....Please pray for Wesley to not get the pain he has had before and for this to be healed or for God to show us what he wants us to do for this wonderful young guy. On the 25th Wes will be 16.

Body Aches!

Man my yard had really gone to the trees and junk since feeling so poorly and having so much pain, then surgery so feeling better which means I want to do more and clean it all up. Well the kids helped cut things down and then today we bundled it all, I started and then Jami and GKids came after three to help, got it all tied and bundled ...but know they won't pick it all up tomorrow but hoping lots of it will be gone.

My body is not used to working out like that anymore... though right now I feel like a truck ran over me and to top it off , I tried to fall at supper in a parking lot after sitting to eat , I got up to leave and it was like my body had other ideas. Luckily there was a van on one side and concrete on the other, missed the step down and just did catch my self enough to plow into the van. Now we are not gonna say exactly where I am hurting from catching it in mid fall, but I am hurting when I walk.....OUCH! ... thank goodness my neck seems okay after all that though just sorta sore there. The rest of my body is not fairing to well..

I am feeling like such a clutz and I scared Jeff my DH to death cuz I made funny noises evidently as I was trying not to fall. Oh well and no pics for funniest home videos either, bummer!....NOT!
Hate to see what I feel like when I lay down for the night and have to get up in the morning....at least I will be here by myself to scream or cry by myself>>>LOL

Keep creating whether it is indoors or outdoors.....but be careful!....LOL
Denise
PS...I got a new chainsaw in the process today though...so watch out for more trees in the fence line to go when we get rid of the mess from this time!